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Alcoholic Spouse Verbal Abuse and Mind Games. Ask Angie: My spouse abuses alcohol on a nightly basis and then uses verbal abuse and mind games which upset me greatly. When I arrive home from work tired and ready to rest, my spouse is ready to drink, argue and fuss. I do not remember the last time I was able to get a full night of rest. Abuse comes in many forms. It doesn''t have to be physical, like in verbal abuse. When someone repeatedly uses words to demean, frighten, or control someone, that''s verbal abuse. It can happen